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I found a new community online that I thought I might try my paws at. (it has closed membership, I have no idea what specifically this means for my chances of getting in). But, I wait, and I have nothing else to specifically waste time on here at work, and I'm so tired I just want to curl up and sleep... but I'm trying hard not to.
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depressed today. don't know why, can't concentrate, feeling helpless and just... fucked in the head. don't know what it is, can't even type straight... fuck.
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So the dinner was amazingly awesome. My supervisors are so cool it hurts. I think the most amazing part of the evening was Marilyn's house. OH. MY. GOD. She has a 200 year old stone farm house. And yes, I know old houses and yes I used to live in a 300 year old log cabin.

But her house is AMAZING. The walls are 2 and a half feet thick, solid stone. The upstairs still has horsehair plaster on the walls. Most of her furnishings are all antiques, all functional. It was just amazing. She had baskets and goards hanging from the ceiling in the dining room and the rooms were... so tall... And it had FOUR STORIES.

And a ton of land. The place was just so totally amazing.

But then on to dinner and the company. Todd brought his wife Liz and I spent most of the evening talking with her. For all the things we had heard about her and the opinions we had formed of her (as a whole, since Shawn said the same things) she was amazingly cool and very comfortable around us.

Marilyn's husband Mike was also very much an interesting guy. He's a potter, does it for a living, has a kiln in their house. It was very cool to hear him talk about some of the stuff he's starting to get into now and how he's working with clay and such. So cool...

All around, I drank a whole glass of wine (something called Big Truck or Red Truck, local) on a totally empty stomach and it sat for about 45 minutes before we ate. That wasn't the best... because by the time I left, was very much feeling heavy headed and did mention to An that since I'm a light weight and did it on a totally empty stomach, probably shouldn't have been driving.

But of course made it home alright. Not bad... not fucking bad.

Have work today, 5-12, which isn't so bad. Just hectic. An said she'd consider coming in just as damage control, since work is really strict recently about overtime.
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A California District Court just ruled the California state capital punishment was unconstitutional...
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I want to have an orgy. Not a problem, one would think, but I'm not that attractive (i don't think, my partners do) and my partners don't get on too well- in bed at least, and I'm tired anyhow, with a headache and stuff.

Marvelous summary that, stuff.

Dinner at the supervisor's house tomorrow. How often does one say THAT?

Fuck. I didn't call my mom and now it's too late. Happy birthday mom, your daughter is a fucktard and forgot.

Aah hell, I feel like shit now.

I'm craving proteine.


Dinner with the supervisors tomorrow. Calories. Hide me?

Sleeping with Jon tonight, An tomorrow, that's good, yes good. I'm craving cold-cuts. No lie... I want a cigarette.

I'm manic today, trying to follow the mental patterns.

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